He curled up in my lap with his face in his hands and just wept. He is after all, just three years old. See my son had just bumped his head (not his first time and certainly not his last) and he was in a lot of pain so he cried as I held him.
Just another day in the life of a boy mom if you ask me but this was no ordinary day and what happened next sent me on a spiral of self-discovery.
As I held my son in my arms, I thought to myself “aww, I’m going to cherish these moments when I’m able to be the one who takes away his pain.” And it’s as if the second I said that, I heard the voice of God say “Really? Really Shannon? You’re taking away his pain? Tell me, what exactly are you doing to physically remove the pain?” [The God of my understanding speaks my language sometimes – sarcasm]. And I instantly realized…nothing. I’m doing nothing to take away his pain. I’m simply supporting him while he processes his own pain.
LIGHTBULB!!!
Isn’t that what I should have been doing all along; in all my relationships? And then (because I over-analyze) I kept thinking about what that all meant. Because if, as a small child myself, I cried to my Mom and expected her (the one who was to love and protect me) to take away my pain, wouldn’t that make sense as to why I tried to take away the pain of my addict? And why I felt so defeated when I couldn’t? And why I expected him in return, to be the one to take away my pain?
And then it hit me that this is what Rusell Brand is talking about when he says “You don’t choose between working a program and not working a program. You’re either working a program or you’re being worked by an unconscious program.”
This is my ‘unconscious programming.’ The one that says if you love me, you’ll take away my pain. And the one that says if I love you, I’ll take away your pain.
Hashtag co-dependency!! I can see now, it was never about me taking away your pain. It’s about offering support, love, and encouragement as you process your own pain.
And you know what’s cool about seeing it this way, I can have a deeper understanding and compassion for myself and for others. My mother is certainly not to blame for comforting me when I’m hurt. And it’s not a 3-year-olds fault that he/she would think that their mother is taking away their pain. But it does give me a change in perspective and I can now see how my thinking got a little distorted in that area. I can see where the problem started and I can make the choice to change. I can also have more compassion for others and honor their journey to discovering the same as well.
Ever look at your photo and just can’t put your finger on what’s wrong with it? I mean, you thought you had it, you thought it would look a certain way. You even made a few different attempts but something is still…well…off. In 5 minuts or less, I’m going to show you exactly what it is that’s standing out as just not right. I’m going to show you how to fix your photos. On today’s episode, we chat about what kind of photos to send to a modeling agency.
Watch the episode below and if you would like to submit a photo, simply email info@shannon-michelle.com and use the subject line – Fix My Photo. Don’t forget to subscribe to the YouTube channel for more videos like this.
Ever look at your photo and just can’t put your finger on what’s wrong with it? I mean, you thought you had it, you thought it would look a certain way. You even made a few different attempts but something is still…well…off. In 5 minuts or less, I’m going to show you exactly what it is that’s standing out as just not right. I’m going to show you how to fix your photos. On today’s episode, Amy learns how to pose her hands so that they look more natural.
Watch the episode below and if you would like to submit a photo, simply email info@shannon-michelle.com and use the subject line – Fix My Photo. Don’t forget to subscribe to the YouTube channel for more videos like this.
Ever look at your photo and just can’t put your finger on what’s wrong with it? I mean, you thought you had it, you thought it would look a certain way. You even made a few different attempts but something is still…well…off. In 5 minuts or less, I’m going to show you exactly what it is that’s standing out as just not right. I’m going to show you how to fix your photos. On today’s episode, Katie learns how to pose so that she can feature her tattoo without it being distracting.
Watch the episode below and if you would like to submit a photo, simply email info@shannon-michelle.com and use the subject line – Fix My Photo. Don’t forget to subscribe to the YouTube channel for more videos like this.
Ever practice in the mirror just to blank when it’s time to strike a pose? Next time, go ahead & get the pose you like (in the mirror) then stop for a minute – close your eyes – and remember what it feels like. Because you won’t have the mirror when it’s time to take a photo, it will be much easier to remember the pose when you know how it’s supposed to feel.
Want more tricks like this?
Join the VIP group.
Want to look relaxed in your photos? Take a deep breath, blow out of your mouth and take the photo at the end of the breath. Know why? Because your muscles are physically the most relaxed at the end of the breath. Try it!
Want more tricks like these?
Join the VIP list.
I loved doing this interview for the Women on Purpose show and here it is! You can listen to it by clicking the photo below. We chat fashion, beauty, the industry, personal stories etc. Enjoy!!
What if I told you there’s one thing that most people have in their kitchen pantry that could help you with your selfies, your family photos or pics of your kiddos? Well, there is! And it’s….
ALUMINUM FOIL.
I’ve spent lots of money on the best reflectors a girl can buy. But when you’re backstage at NY Fashion Week, and you’ve left one of those dazzling reflectors at home and there’s no time to get a new one, it’s tin foil to the rescue!
Well, that’s how it started at least.
Then I realized that tin foil actually worked better than some of those fancy reflectors! So I started making my own. And so did a lot of other backstage photographers. In fact, for many of us, it’s now the go-to . When you’re travelling, tin foil is easy to get, easy to use and when you’re done with it, you just toss it out. No need to make extra room for it in your luggage.
But for you lovelies at home looking to up your selfie game, try a bit of aluminum foil. Grab a piece just large enough to cover a small baking pan, and while you’re facing the light, try holding the foil at about breast level, with the side farthest away from you, angled up at your chin. You may be able to feel the light hit your face. You should definitely be able to see the light hit your face! Don’t believe me? Check out the two photos below.
The one on the left has an aluminum foil reflector added.
[QUICK TRICK: If it’s windy out or it’s too flimsy for you to hold the foil, wrap it around a book or magazine so that it’s a bit more sturdy]
You can easily see that on the left, there is a bit more light on my face than the one on the right. Look at the cheeks, under the eyes, and the shadow on my neck. But the biggest wow of all is the amount of light in my eyes. Totally unedited [for education purposes only…hahaha], you can see how much extra pop or twinkle I have in my eyes when I am holding a reflector.
[QUICK TRICK: Don’t forget, if you’re shooting with an iPhone, you can still take the picture by pressing the “+” button where you normally control the volume. It’s so much easier than trying to reach the round button at the bottom!]
BOUDOIR – THE ULTIMATE IN INTIMATE GIFT GIVING.
Making it the perfect groom’s gift. Join us for the after party at Middleton Place and learn more about our services, products and meet Shannon Michelle in person! ENTER TO WIN 2 FREE TICKETS. Make sure you’re on our mailing list [HERE] and we’ll raffle them off by Jan 21st. Good luck!!
Featured Venus:
- Middleton Place
- Coleman Hall & Chapel
- Charleston Harbor Resort & Marina
- The Stables at Boals Farm
- Governor Thomas Bennett House
- I`ON Meeting House
Presented in Parnership with:
Engaged or Getting Married in 2017?!
Join us at this year’s Revolution Wedding Tours in charming, Charleston, SC. As the only boudoir photographer invited, we are very honored and grateful to celebrate the finale` of Charleston Wedding Week [produced by Charleston Wedding Magazine] by participating in this one of a kind event. These tours are so fun for brides to be as they can experience each venu’s potential for their day, including a variety of custom desing concepts. You can find us at the stunning Middleton Place, where we’ll offer samples from our unique product line. Meet Shannon Michelle in person and browse sample albums, prints, gift ideas and more. Start to design your own boudoir experience and give your groom the ultimate in intimate gift giving.
For tickets or more info, click HERE.
Featured Venus:
- Middleton Place
- Coleman Hall & Chapel
- Charleston Harbor Resort & Marina
- The Stables at Boals Farm
- Governor Thomas Bennett House
- I`ON Meeting House